Anytime we take a look at relationships between men and women holistically, it could be described in practical terms as a mutual connection or magnetism between a male adult and a female adult aimed at a fulfilling marriage.
Here is a story of a young man:
‘Our house is something you can call or refer to as being of middle-class standard. Of course this is not too bad, but my eyes are up on the high class girls. I just love anything gorgeous in a lady, I mean that I can’t just keep my eyes off this particular girl whose walking steps thrill me. We met at a fast-food joint somewhere in our area. My eyes were fixed strictly on the T.V. as a very romantic movie was being shown. I wasn’t alone, my younger brother Tale was with me, then came in this babe, looking all sparkling, and don’t forget I have always been an ardent fan of classy ladies… You can’t understand, their sight is always irresistible! Her walking steps was graceful and elegant, she had the scent of an angel. I guess I was overwhelmed with all these facts because I had always dreamt of people like that. So, I stood up and turned, facing her as though it was a coincidence, we were almost hitting each other, “Oh! Sorry! Ouch sorry!” We exchanged. “Hi”, she said. I quickly replied, “Do you know that you resemble my sister?” “Oh! Really?” she replied. After all the drama, she giggled and we proceeded to where I was seated. As the gentleman that I am, I offered to be responsible for her orders. “You know what, a girl like you deserves to be compensated after a gentleman almost … you know?” There was I bragging on what I couldn’t afford. The funny thing about it was that she didn’t reply. After two winks, her reply was spontaneous, “Oh yeah, why not?” I was ecstatic! Yesssss!!! “Smart Wilson! Common Wilson you did it!” I said to myself.
My brother was totally engrossed with the movie on the screen. “Oh meet my brother his name is Tale”, “Bruv meet my new friend Malinda.” Fast-forward, after the discussion that day, I succeeded in spending the money meant for the purchase of my handout in school on Monday, and this was a Saturday. She took a taxi, while I pretended as if my car was parked across the street. So when we saw that she was far gone in the taxi, where we stood waving, my brother and I simply opted for Plan B, “Let’s trek home!” How do I reconcile this meeehnn?! Hnmmm… My brother took a good look at me with such hatred, and there I knew that, if eyes were gun, Tale would have shot me ten times with a double-barrel and AK-47 Assault-rifle simultaneously!!! He didn’t speak with me again for the whole weekend.
That didn’t stop me from fixing dates with her. And so we met subsequently at various planned eateries, which resulted to either I ended up exhausting my small pocket money, or I had to borrow money and sometimes my friend’s TIMBERLAND boot to impress my babe. Her looks scattered my brain each time I sighted her in her gorgeous look.
All for the sake of love, I had received several calls from Malinda to meet her various demands from one end to the other, N12, 000 to make her hair but she was left with only N4,000. She always wanted to go to the movies every Friday. She told me some time ago that her most treasured thing is, guess what? Shoes! Two pairs of shoes from me to Malinda every month was constant, the least of the shoes she wore was for N6, 000. It was becoming too much for me to bare, and I had always wanted to tell her to her face that she is too expensive to maintain, but each time we saw, I would have rehearsed what I wanted to say, so immediately we see, she would hug me, “Oh darling thank you!!! You are such a wonderful gentleman…”, and then the only statement that would proceed from my mouth was, “Do you love the shoes?” Guess Malinda’s response? “I will manage it, well I have to buy a suitable bag with it, when will you give me the money?” The effect of the hug would still be on me, so I would want to prove that I’m a capable guy, you know” I will simply deep my hand into my pocket and, “My bag is #15,000, I will loan you #5,000, are you a capable man?”, Oh my God! She would just touch the ego inside me, then my Mumu Button is pressed again. Before I know what is happening again, my pocket and bank account is empty again! Shit!
I had to practically drink garri – cassava flakes with kulikuli – groundnut smash on several occasions. Funny enough, every time I asked her about my proposal to marry her, she always told me that I should give her time to think about it, and eight months are gone.
Hnmmmm… I love this girl, but, she is too expensive for me to maintain and satisfy. What do I do?’
Here is someone’s story, and surely it is a similar case with several young men out there. If you feel, think, or know that you cannot financially satisfy the exorbitant or outrageous financial demands of a woman early enough, I bet you, someone is not meant to enjoy some glamour while the other person is choking. Brother please don’t choke yourself, it is fine to call her attention to it early enough, so that there could be some adjustment and understanding in her spending, but if you think she is the type who will not negotiate all that and she doesn’t want to be considerate with you, it is wise to realise that girl is not meant for you. Why this is an advisable opinion is that the expenses for your wedding will surely put you in debt and your marriage expenditures to satisfy your sweetheart will be suicidal. Just being honest with oneself will solve a lot of foreseeable troubles. Relationship is meant to be one of mutual understanding, joy and fulfillment and not the other way round! Enjoy your relationship, and let God be your binding chord.