Wanting to have the wedding of the year is fantastic, but you better be husband and wife of the year for your marriage to survive.
Your wedding day is very important but not as vital as the preparedness of the couple walking down the aisle.
The amazing thing for me is that no family member would be willing to donate money for intending couple to attend a professional marital class but people are willing to drop for a lavish wedding.
It’s even more interesting to note that they would be unwilling to donate funds for you to take a course in Harvard that can improve your professional competence yet they will gladly take “Aso ebi”.
So if you are wise that should be instructive enough for you to know that all the people you want to impress are at best the supporters club of a football club who are consistently inconsistent depending on how your game plan meet their emotional needs.
Never allow anyone push you into what they are not willing to fund. There is no shame in having a ‘drive through’ or “coffee wedding” wedding after all you have taken responsibility according to the laws of the land where you live and far better than folks who are just living together illegally.
Adults must be able to make their choice and take responsibility for their choices. Never allow anyone or culture or man made traditions set you back financially. If they all channel their energy for your wedding into grooming your spouse there won’t be marital problems because everyone would show up at the marital table well groomed.
Wedding is just a few hours and you can’t afford to be prodigal by blowing millions just to announce your entry into the marital building.
If their budget can buy you a land please go ahead and show them how you intend to build a house in the first 2 years and ask them to choose between a lavish wedding or coming for a lavish house warming in 2 years?
That it has been done in a certain way doesn’t mean we must continue when we can take responsibility as a new generation of ancestors for our children and their children. After all we all switched from typewriters to hand held device so why can’t wedding also change especially where the law specifies that all you need is:
– Parental consent
– Notification at the registry;
– Licensed venue and minister
– Marriage certificate
– 2 witnesses
– N75,000 is all you need. Save the rest for your enjoyment after Wedding!
You have no business postponing your wedding when you earn enough to provide a decent accommodation, feed your mouth and an extra mouth and you are responsible enough to handle a marriage.
However how do you prepare yourself for marriage?