If you’re few steps to tying the knot this info is timely for you. If on the other hand your marriage is a done, ‘signed and sealed’ deal, you might still be in time to save your home. Love is ideal for a home but for a long-lasting relationship between man and wife; all your ‘money-matters’ need to be handled upfront and delicately at that. People tend to overlook the impact that money has over their lives until a few years down the line (if that) when they are arguing about who to pay which bills and who not to. Financial missteps could be disastrous for your marriage and should be avoided at all cost.
A few such missteps include;
Being secretive about money
Most marriages suffer because of lack of communication. Spouses treat themselves as strangers when it comes to money. I can’t say I really blame them; with the increasing rate of separation and divorces in the country, people would much rather keep their little ‘secret stash’ for rainy days. The truth is that to avoid drowning yourselves in deep waters, you need to be open about money. Talk about your income, your debts, your credits, your spending habits; put everything out in the open. Although it’s better to have this talk before marriage, it’s not late to do so now.
Turning a blind eye to money problems
It’s funny how one spouse would find out about a financial problem (most likely an unpaid bill) and turn a blind eye to it waiting expectantly for the partner to handle it. This also boils down to communication. Don’t put things off when they are related to money. Tackle issues sooner before they become even more complicated. The best way to resolve this is to try and split responsibilities up. Do so openly without assumptions. Your husband might be assuming that you’ll pay the NEPA bill this month and you on your part, might be thinking that he already paid the bill. This is why you need both communication and clarity.
Having zero- savings and no financial goals
As a couple, you need to sit down and plan for your future together. You took a together-forever oath, so you don’t expect to just take it one day at a time. Forever is a long time to live without solid plans. A lot of marriages fail as a result of this mistake. The husband and his wife have no plans for their future financially and when children with their added responsibilities enter the picture, the little money they have tends to diminish. Aside from your personal savings, it’s advisable to make savings as a family. Put some money aside every month.
Marriages where only one partner carries the financial burden of the family are most likely to crash sooner than later. There should be support from the spouse. The couple should be able to split the burden in order for the family to make any headway financially. Marriage requires teamwork not just for reproduction, but for money too. When one person handles the finances of the family it is very easy for the other to misunderstand them. This brings about rebellion and inevitably dispute. On the other hand, the spouse handling the finances could be harboring secret resentment towards their partner for not helping out. You don’t want to be a burden to your spouse so figure out a way to help them out.
Merging your accounts
In the spirit of love and to prove their trust in their spouse, some people make the mistake of forming a joint account. While it is a sweet gesture, it might be the fastest route to a divorce. What a lot of people forget is that ‘you are first an individual before you are a husband/wife’. As such, you have private needs and wants. If you must have a joint account, then do so but maintain your personal accounts as well. See the joint account as your family savings account. Before you start a joint account though, both of you should sit and discuss the terms of operation of the said account.
As you can clearly see, most of these problems are avoidable, but due to ignorance some people walk right into them. Now that we’ve clearly pointed them out, do the needful and have that long avoided money talk with your spouse. It’s a start in the right direction so stop putting it off.
Culled from Nairametrics