As a married man, knowing your wife’s love language makes life more enjoyable for you. It will ensure that you’re pressing the right button at the right time and not just running wild.
Experts have drilled down love languages to five. They are:
1. Rendering an act of service
2. Giving words of affirmation
3. Buying gifts
4. Spending quality time
To know which fits your spouse perfectly well, you will need to experiment with these love languages over a period of time. When you recognise the one that lightens up your spouse, please put all your effort and resources into activating it. It works!
Here are insights and tips about the five love languages:
Words of Affirmation
For those whose love language is Words of Affirmation, continuously praising and appreciating them will make them feel loved and accepted by their spouse.
It is important to regularly appreciate your wife for every little thing done. That is the only way she will feel loved if her primary love language is Words of Affirmation.
If you fail to utter a word of affirmation, not even a million dollar gift will prove your love to her.
According to a foremost relationship expert, “If your spouse’s primary love language is words of affirmation, your spoken praise and appreciation will fall like rain on parched soil. Before long, you will see new life sprouting in your marriage as your spouse responds to your words of love.”
Acts of Service
Actions speak louder than words. If your spouse’s love language is Acts of Service, you will have to “show your faith by your works.” You will help with the laundry. You will help with the dishes. You will help to baby sit. You will help to move stuff round the house.
Those whose love language is Acts of Service expect their spouse to help them to do stuff. The Acts of Service personality would rather see your action than listen to your endless sweet nothings. It makes no sense to them, service does.
Fear not! Those whose love language is receiving gifts don’t expect you to break the bank to make them happy. They are just interested in anything that comes from your hand to them irrespective of the size and amount.
Gifts to these people mean everything. They expect gifts to accompany utterances of love. It is not enough to confess and declare “I love you,” gift must accompany it.
Wedding anniversary, first date anniversary, first kiss anniversary, etc. all these should be celebrated with a gift – however small.
In the words of another expert, “The gifts need not be expensive or elaborate; it’s the thought that counts. Even something as simple as a homemade card or a few cheerful flowers will communicate your love to your spouse. Little things mean a lot to a person whose primary love language is receiving gifts.”
Quality time means giving your spouse your undivided attention all the time and every time. Your wife whose love language is quality time expects you to always listen irrespective of the moment.
The TV, magazine, phone calls etc must take the back seat whenever your spouse needs you. Your time – not your money, expensive gifts or romantic tales – is what is needed here. For your wife to feel loved, you must create time from no time to give her an undivided attention.
Touching your spouse all the time means so much. Gentle and meaningful touch conveys big meaning to your spouse when her love language is touch.
Relationship experts agree that the love language of physical touch includes everything from putting a hand on your mate’s shoulder as you walk by, touching her leg as you’re driving together and holding hands while you’re walking to kissing, embracing and sexual intercourse.
Love is only conveyed to your wife – when touch is her love language – if you reach out and touch her.